I read this somewhere.

Dear Twilight fans,

Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection. Enjoy fantasizing about that.

Sincerely, Logic.

I read this at this amazing site (dear blank, please blank). You need to check it out. I dont think I've laughed this much in a long time.

It's a magical moment and it's fleeting.

I’m writing after a long time. I feel inspired. It’s a special moment. I’m listening to some Coldplay song whose name I don’t know, but it reminds me of happy days and fresh cut grass. It’s about Christmas. It’s one of those rare moments where I feel truly happy and sad at the same time.

I had a strange evening. I went over to my friends place to do a psychology project. We went out to get some chilli fried potatoes. And as we walked in that perfect cold weather that was just cold enough to make my cheeks a bit more rosy and the tips of my finger tingle, I realized that I would always remember that moment. I would always treasure those simple fifteen minutes filled to brim with pointless conversation, some greasy potatoes from the shady Chinese restaurant, cola bars and the smell of cigarettes in the cold air. Don’t you love that about life? It gives away little moments like these like presents on a Christmas morning. These emotions make life a bit more bearable, a bit more magical. I know I’d say this out loud if I were in a movie right now.

I don’t want to recall the rest of night which didn’t go as well but I don’t think I’ve felt as happy as I feel right now. Maybe it’s the Coldplay song that I’m listening to on the loop or the fact that I suddenly want to sing and dance.
I feel like I’m a bit in love and a bit sad at what has been happening and how I’ve been. But right now I want to thank this one boy who writes his thoughts in a little tumblr blog, who has given me a piece of heaven unknowingly through his words. He doesn’t know me, neither do I know him. Can one be in love with someone without ever speaking or looking at them? Can someone be in love with just words?

Maybe I’ll write again soon about what I’ve been doing, but right now I’ll go hum a little tune and smile a bit more. ☺

“Up above candles on air flicker
Oh they flicker and they float
But I'm up here holding on
To all those chandeliers of hope”

This is a witty title, isn't it?

How apprpriate. ^^

I’m in a dark place right now. So much so that I wanted to slap someone when I saw my cheerful white background with its cheerful little stupid header. I get up feeling lost. Is that possible? To feel lost in your own bed? I don’t feel inspired and I don’t want to complete my homework assignments or even just do my own work like practice on my SAT math or even work on my so called book. Things at home are strange. They’re not bad…just strange. I hate the festive season.

I had a strange dream last night. It was one of those horrible dreams in which you know you’re in a nightmare and even if you try, you can’t get up. And then when eventually you do get up, you discover that it’s still a dream. Very inception like, btw. I’d appreciate the strangeness of the whole ordeal if I didn’t just feel so damned unsettled forty hours after I had woken up.

It’s been this way for a week now. I’m borderline paranoid. I feel exhausted even when I’m not. I guess I’m just not satisfied. I’m not happy with where I am academically or if I’m achieving my goals where school extra curricular is concerned. Oh and thanks for asking. My Diwali Mela sucked. A friend of mine said that she felt defeated afterwards. She was right. I felt defeated too. It was just THAT bad. I don’t want to write like this y’know?! I don’t. I want to write down shiny happy things because there’s nothing REALLY wrong with my life. There’s just something wrong with my head. I read all these happy blogs and I want to hit myself for being such a pessimist, for romanticizing every little problem in my life. But I can’t stop. I can’t not think about all those things that are unsatisfactory in my life. I cant just ignore the feeling of helplessness when my mom complains about how crap her life is. I can’t do it. I cant get myself to go out and talk to people, to stop wanting to just sit in a corner and watch hours of Megavideo. And what I don’t want is, to subject anyone who reads me, with incessant whining. So I’m sorry.

I suppose right now, I just want need someone to give me a call and tell me that I’m not slowly going crazy. I’m going to try and cover up the bad writing with a semi-impressive quote now.

“I would hurl words into this darkness and wait for an echo, and if an echo sounded, no matter how faintly, I would send other words to tell, to march, to fight, to create a sense of hunger for life that gnaws in us all.”

HATEPOST HATEPOST HATEPOST HATEPOST HATEPOST HATEPOST HATEPOST

Okay, so I’m back sooner than I said.
You know who I hate? Liars. Liars and hypocrites. At times when I’m typing all these angry words, I feel guilty about subjecting my obviously negative emotions to all of you reading this but honestly, its MY blog and too bad if you hate this, you can read one of the happier posts. I hate the people who I have surrounded myself with, in my life. More than that I hate myself for not finding the right kind of people. After all, doesn’t it somewhat depend on me?
Have you ever had a friend that screwed you over but you just kept returning to her over and over again to find yourself being engulfed by those similar feeling of claustrophobia just because its more comfortable just being with her? I think every one has at least one of those friends. But the question is, why do we? Why do we keep returning to them just to get hurt again? Or is it just me?
I find it hard to trust people these days. It’s because I’ve been screwed over too many times. Why is it SO hard for people to just STOP lieing? Why is it THAT hard to just say what the real deal is?
I HATE EVERYONE.
Okay, now I’m off to the Diwali Mela. Imma write happy things about that later.
I feel so much better. I might hate everyone right now, but I love you forevez blogger.

Mmmm. I feel good. Wonder how long that will last. Mmm.

I don’t know if its been long since Ive last posted but somehow the exitement of having a blog has dissipated. I’m going to now make a sad smiley. → ☹
Some how, too many people who I know, know about this sacred space (YES I WILL refer it as that. WHATCHA GONNA DO?) and I don’t feel as comfortable posting. But who cares right?
I’ve been too busy to think about even writing. There is just so much that I need to do that I’m avoiding. I need o study for my SATs if I wish to go to a good college and continue with my book. (Im trying, TRYING to write a book.)

Writing this book is important to me. I have a story in mind that I want to desperately pen down on paper but the words fail to come. I really admire authors who have managed to pen down entire epics and novels. I even admire Stephanie Meyer (even though some of my overly passionate friends would like to stone me for saying that) solely based on the fact that she was able to pen down not one, not two but about 4 novels. Een the most talented writers fail to do that at times. But enough about this.

I’m looking forward to the coming months because they’ll be filled with so much activity. We have an exchange programme happening in school and the festival of Diwali (Indian equivalent of Christmas) is also here. We’ll have a small fate in our school with a rickety giant wheel and rusty old rides that look like health hazards but are SO much fun to ride on. There will be lame stalls filled with stupid games and there will be a crappy DJ with a lot of dancing. I know, it doesn’t sound that great, but it always ends up being fun. Sometimes I love my life because nothing seems to be wrong, because sometimes I’m so busy that I don’t have time to focus on what’s missing. I’m looking forward to the next few months because I’ll be so busy that it wont occur to me that I don’t have parents who let me get out as often as I’d like or I don’t think I’ve made friends who I’ll be in touch with after school. Sometimes life is just like a long road trip when the view from outside the window is breathtaking.
But I don’t want to dwell on how great everything is because I know I’ll jinx it and that would be another strange rant post that I will immediately regret writing right after I press the “post now” option.

So, until we meet next time, my loves. Don’t wait up, I don’t know when I’ll be able to visit next.

"This is the true joy of life, the being used up for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one."
- George Bernard Shaw

Hello, to these lovely ladies.

So, I got my first EVVVAARR award from the ever so lovely MAGDAAAA. I love you, Mags. You rock my socks.
1) Sum up your blogging philosophy/ experiance etc in 5 words.
-- Love. friends, excitement, dreams and therapy
2) Pass on the award to 10 other bloggers who you think have substance
Here it is:

Artemisla D.
Natalie
Kassandra
Magda:)
Heather Taylor
Deidra
Ivy
Arushi

However, I only know these 8, but pass it on guys! spread the cheer. You deserve 40 more awards like these. :D

I'm going to call this one "LISTS" because that's just how original I am.

You know what I loved about this morning? Getting up and checking my blog to find 5 perfect strangers commenting lovely things on my on previous post. I know that I’ll be checking my blog again and again all day long.
There is just something in the way strangers from around the world can provide you with so much comfort, and a sense of warmth. I find it strange because one should only care for the approval of those who are the closest to you, whose presence makes a difference in your life. Yet I find my heart skip a beat every time I see an appreciative comment or get sad when someone takes out time to tell me how much I suck. (HATERS SUCK, OKAY. JAJAJAJA)

Right now, I’m so busy with schoolwork that I barely have time to breath let alone think. It’s just been a flurry of unfinished essays, unfinished projects, lists, homework and whole other list of unfinished businesses (HA HA. Yes, that’s just how lame I am.)

I have 15 minutes till I have to go and work on a project (care for some art appreciation anyone?) so I’ve decided to post a list of things. About me. I LOVE making lists. I’d marry a list if it were possible. “insert awkward silence”

5 THINGS ABOUT ME, WHICH YOU WOULDN’T CARE ABOUT BUT SHOULD READ ANYWAY.

1. I love Japanese people. No, seriously. I squeal every time I see a Japanese tourist. My friends think it’s strange, to which I generally say, “Yeah think? OOHH, LOOK, THERE’S ANOTHER ONE.” I love everything about there culture. Especially Manga and sushi ( <3 ). There are these two anime shows that I used to watch ALL the time called “Tsubasa Reservoire Chronicles” and “Cardcaptor Sakura”. You should definitely watch it. It’ll blow. Your. Mind. Or vaguely amuse you if you’re not a FREAK like me.
2. I have a strange obsession with rings. And strange looking jewelry. The stranger it is, the better.
3. I never leave home without my ipod. Never. I’m probably taking it to my grave. Or pickle jar. (You got that right. I plan to be preserved. Not cremated or burnt. Now stop rolling your eyes.)
4. I am prone to doing the strangest of things like saying things that aren’t funny (THEY WERE FUNNY IN MY HEAD OKAY? SOBS) or naming…things or get caught talking to myse…lets not go there.
5. The grand finale. I am obsessed with lists and I will make another list of things about me and other things later, to demonstrate that.

“Sometimes you have to get to know someone really well to realize you're really strangers.”

Also, TAG YOU'RE IT.